RECORDING THE GROUP'S EXPERIENCE

CANCER SUPPORT GROUP MEETINGS

Occasionally a person of particular skill or training will be invited to speak to the group, from their field of expertise, when that information would be helpful to the group participants. This, however, is not the main focus of the local cancer support group. The primary focus is to hear the needs of people and to give support.

Usually there is no "program". The next section outlines a typical support meeting.

A MEETING PLAN FOR A CANCER SUPPORT GROUP

The order of the group meetings the authors have experienced is as follows:

1. Greeting and preliminary conversation.
2. The facilitator will talk about the why and how of the formation of the group if there are any first timers.
3. The facilitator will ask each one there how they are doing, recent developments in their illness, or the illness of their companion and about the needs of the patient and the companion.
Frequently there is a sensed need to explore some aspect of an attendee's concerns that are not verbalized, but there should be no urging to talk about anything the person does not want to share.
4. The facilitator should be sensitive to the ability of group members to give information and support to others in the group. In a group where members have become well acquainted this sharing flows easily and will need little, if any, guidance. The facilitator will sense the time to move on to the next person or next topic.
5. Each attendee is encouraged to express himself and to air any needs that he/she has, and to make an offer to help individuals or the group.
6. When there has been a death, the facilitator leads the group in processing that event, and in eulogizing and/or memorializing that person.
7. The list of persons who have attended or whom the group knows about who have cancer is referred to and attendees tell of their contacts with those persons or their situations.
8. Usually the facilitator asks if there are particular needs that someone wants to express.
9. Date and place of the next meeting are set.
10. At the conclusion of the discussion along the lines expressed above, the group stands and has a "group hug". In the circle the facilitator expresses a prayer thought about our meeting, our supplying some of the needs of each other, and what it has done for us to be together.
11. We then have light refreshments such as a cake or pie, and coffee and/or soft drinks, provided by the host home.

MEETING FREQUENCY

The meetings of the group which furnish the main experience of the authors, are monthly except for December. There is a dinner meeting in November or December, set between Thanksgiving and Christmas. When the list of attendees remained pretty much the same, meetings were suspended for July and August. However for the last two years we have met each month in the summer. If someone has a need to meet, such as new developments or a new person has been diagnosed with cancer, attendees are called to meet and hear and be with that person.

It has been our experience that even when only one or two attend, some need is addressed and we are better for having met.

TOPICS FOR DISCUSSION

1. Particular types of cancer that attendees deal with.
2. How the attendees feel about their cancer journey. Feelings run the gamut of human experience despair, apprehension, encouragement, loneliness, togetherness, how cancer is affecting family members, guilt feelings because of remission or particularly good progress in light of the greater suffering of others, personal challenges and joys, and other matters related to the groups needs.
3. People we know that have cancer and would benefit from being a part of the group and who will contact them about coming to the next meeting.
4. Magazine and newspaper articles attendees have read about treatment options, clinical trials, hospitals, physicians, our support group, and other items of common interest.

HUMOR IN MEETINGS

An ever present aura of concern does not overshadow the humor that is encouraged and often expressed. Laughter is encouraged as people with common challenges see themselves in their own particular circumstance. Laughter is therapeutic for cancer patients and those close to them. It comes naturally and easily. It is always helpful. Just as an insider has to be an insider to tell an "inside joke", those who experience the cancer challenge are more able than others to see the humor in their experiences. We should never forget this and see that humor is expressed freely when the opportunity presents itself. We never make light of the challenge, but humor can de-fang some of it. It has been said that a good belly laugh is as good for the emotional health as 20 situps are for the health of the body. It surely enhances the spirit.

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